As National Grief Awareness Day approaches on Aug. 30, trauma expert Judith A. Swack, Ph.D., whose book "Clear Trauma Now: The Powerful Solution for Getting Unstuck" has been named a top book on grief, is shedding light on why some people remain stuck in grief long after a loss. According to Dr. Swack, unresolved trauma can keep individuals trapped in a cycle of pain, making it difficult to access joyful memories of the person they lost. Instead, every reminder of their loved one can automatically trigger the agony of the moment they died or left.
Dr. Swack explains that during a traumatic loss, the body's fight-flight-freeze response becomes conditioned to remember and react to everything that occurred at that time, causing people to repeatedly relive the shock. This physiological response can overshadow the positive memories, leaving the grieving person overwhelmed by distress. Healing begins, she says, by calming this trauma response so that the nervous system no longer reacts as though the loss is happening in the present.
To help those struggling with grief, Dr. Swack outlines five first steps toward healing. First, she advises separating the trauma from the person you loved. Many grieving people fear that letting go of the trauma will sever their connection to the deceased, but Dr. Swack asserts the opposite is true. Trauma can become fused with the memory of a loved one, so every remembrance triggers pain instead of love. Healing the trauma allows positive memories and gratitude to return without losing the relationship.
Second, she encourages identifying the "hidden layers" beneath grief. Grief is rarely just sadness; it often includes shock, fear, anger, hurt, guilt, shame, and feelings of helplessness. Recognizing these emotions is crucial for addressing them. Third, Dr. Swack suggests listening for limiting beliefs that loss may have created. Traumatic loss often leaves behind unconscious conclusions such as "It's my fault," "People always leave me," or "I can't trust anyone." These beliefs can impact relationships, work, and self-confidence long after the loss, but being aware of them is a vital step toward healing.
Fourth, she highlights the feeling of emptiness as a hallmark of unresolved loss trauma. People often try to fill this void through work, food, relationships, or other compulsive behaviors. Acknowledging that the emptiness is part of the trauma response can help individuals seek healthier ways to heal. Finally, Dr. Swack emphasizes that healing trauma is not about forgetting someone or "moving on." One of the biggest barriers to recovery is the fear that healing means leaving a loved one behind. Yet resolving the trauma surrounding a loss doesn't erase the relationship; it allows people to stop reliving the worst moment of their lives and begin remembering the love, joy, and meaning that came before the loss.
"Healing trauma at all levels allows people to easily recall special memories of loving connection and appreciate the ways in which their lives were enriched by having known that person," Dr. Swack says. Her book, "Clear Trauma Now: The Powerful Solution for Getting Unstuck," was recently named the 2026 Silver Medal Winner for Grief Books by the Coalition of Visionary Resources (COVR). The book details healing practices Dr. Swack pioneered as part of her Healing from the Body Level Up™ (HBLU™) methodology, a comprehensive system designed to clear trauma at the conscious, unconscious, body, and soul levels.
For those interested in experiencing trauma healing firsthand, Dr. Swack will present a "Clear Trauma Now Live Healing" webinar on Thursday evenings in September: Sept. 3 from 7 to 9 p.m. and Sept. 10, 17, and 24 from 7 to 8:30 p.m. EDT. More information is available at hblu.org/live-healing-experience. Dr. Swack's work focuses on identifying and clearing the root patterns that drive emotional and physical distress, and she offers hope to those who have not found success with traditional approaches.
